From the “if only they knew what they were saying” category…

We ended up having lunch at Moe’s this past Saturday afternoon. They had the TV on – tuned to a bull-riding show on ESPN. The kids were fascinated.

“Why was that man trying to ride that buffalo?”
“Why does he keep falling off?”
“Did that hurt? That looked like it hurt?”
“Why is the bull trying to knock him over?”

…You get the idea. During dinner that evening, C (our five year old) brought it up again. He wanted to know if I could ride a bull or not.

“No, I’ve never tried,” I said. “I don’t think I’d be very good at it.”

He looked disappointed, and I suddenly remembered a long forgotten remnant about my wife’s past. “But your mom has ridden a mechanical bull,” I added. “I bet she could.”

She laughed. “That’s right I have!”

C was confused “A mechanical bull?”

His mom explained to him that some restaurants have mechanical bulls for people to try. They went back and forth about this for a while, until I realized what was stumping him. “For practice,” I chimed in. “So you can practice before you get on a real bull.”

“Oh!” He nodded. He understood practice. “Wait!” He said to me, suddenly having an idea. “That’s what you can do before you ride!”

“Me ride? Before I ride what?”

“You can practice! Mom can pretend to be the bull – just like the robot – and you can ride her. You can practice! How about that?”

There was, as you might imagine, a little bit of quiet after this question as his momma and I tried not to laugh.

“Huh. That’s not a bad idea. What do you think, momma? Feel like giving daddy a ride?”

“I don’t think that would be such a good idea, daddy.”

“I could get a cowboy hat.”

“Yeah, yeah!” Both kids chimed in

“No…My back’s a little sore.”

Oh well. At least she didn’t say she had a headache.