One of the kids’s favorite songs is “Fast Monkey”, by SteveSongs. If you hadn’t heard it, here’s a little taste:

I’m fast,
I’m really really fast.
I’m faster…
than a fast monkey!

The song repeats this lyric subtituting in a different word for fast each time: slow, loud, quiet, and so forth.

The reason it’s such a favorite is that we’ve started using it when every anyone says “I’m.”

For example, if you say “I’m hungry,” someone will say “I’m really really hungry,” and then everyone will finish with “I’m hungrier…than a hungry monkey.”

Harmless enough, right?

The other day after dinner, as our five-year old was working on his homework, he heaved a deep sigh. “Oh man,” he said. “This is hard.”

Without thinking, I said “It’s really, really hard.”

“It’s harder,” he responded, “than a hard monkey!”

My wife and I looked at each other and tried not to smile.

He started to giggle. “That’s funny, because it’s a different kind of hard.”

I very carefully didn’t say anything. He is, after all, only five, and I’m sure he wasn’t thinking what I was.

“Because monkey’s aren’t hard like homework is hard.” he said, laughing. “They’re a different kind of hard.”

I took a careful drink of water. My wife left the table, turning her back to us as she went. I’m fairly sure I saw her shoulders shaking.

“You’re right,” I said. “That is pretty funny.”

“Mmm, yeah,” he said, going back to his homework.

I’m not entirely sure what he was talking about, but that’s okay. I think some things are better left unknown.